Celebrity Scissorhands
Contents |
Host
Alex Zane (2006)
George Lamb (2007-8)
Reggie Yates (Keep Your Hair On: Celebrity Scissorhands)
Co-hosts
Experts: Lee Stafford, Ben Cooke, Stephen Glendinning, Elaine Sullivan Child, Janet Ginnings
Gina Yashere and Aaron the Barber (Keep Your Hair On: Celebrity Scissorhands)
Broadcast
Brighter Pictures for BBC Three/One, 5 November 2006 to 14 November 2008 (3 series)
as Keep Your Hair On: Celebrity Scissorhands, Brighter Pictures for BBC One, 6 to 17 November 2006 (10 episodes in 1 series)
Synopsis
The usual celeb reality thing. Celebs learn hairdressing skills and at the end the public vote for the five they want to see take on the task of coiffuring for the Children In Need telethon. It returned with even more obscure microcelebs for two further runs in 2007 and 2008, before being officially axed (or maybe that should be "sheared").
Keep Your Hair On
WARNING: Hair-related jokes to follow
It's always really difficult to review game shows that are played for charity. On one hand, there's the dismal quality, the poor gameplay, the incompetent hosts and the format that otherwise wouldn't have ever made it past the inventor's mouth. On the other hand, there's the poor starving African children. Decisions, decisions.
With this one however, we've been lucky. It's so bad that we can give it a really bad review without feeling guilty.
For a start, there's just *ninety seconds* of gameplay in each show (Although each installment is just 15 minutes, it runs slower than 1 vs 100. No, really.) and the idea is rehashed from Ant and Dec's Beat the Barber back in the nineties.
Three contestants are introduced, the unluckiest of which will receive the haircut from hell. So far, so odd. They then talk to them. And the audience. And the barber. And the teachers. They then introduce the eight possible haircuts on offer for the loser, including such delights as the Mullet, the Monk and the Slaphead. The premise around this is quite clever - whoever does the best in Round One can eliminate two of the worst haircuts should they be unlucky in the final. Unfortunately, it's done in a deadly style.
Round One is a stupid game that wouldn't look out of place in Da Bungalow such as sticking hair on a baldie or sticking cheesy puffs to their face using a face mask. Winner gets two hairnets (reasoning as mentioned before), second place gets one and third place gets nowt. They then do some more talking, usually about Children in Need and the Celebrity Scissorhands contestants, before the final appears.
The final is always Beat the Buzz, possibly the worst and most unfair idea in game show history. The loser from Round 1 has to hold a giant pair of clippers, one minute is put on the clock. They are asked hair-related questions for the opportunity to pass the clippers on and whoever is holding the clippers when the time ends loses. Obviously, this means that a contestant who has done nothing wrong in the entire show can end up with the haircut. This is kids TV, people! It's unfair and they know it.
The loser gets whisked off to a barber's chair, usually mock-happy, as "it's all for charity", and given a haircut selected from a lottery machine. The final climax of the show is given about sixty seconds while the theme music plays, which is rubbish considering a ten year old is losing their pride and joy.
Yes, it's all for charity, but that doesn't make it watchable.
And yes, the hair puns got shaved off by my editor.
Participants
Series 1
- Sarah Cawood (telly person)
- Darren Day (TV personality, it says here)
- Ortis (another telly person)
- Michelle Dewbury (former Apprentice)
- Richard Fairbrass (off The Desert Forges)
- Scott Mills (off Radio 1)
- Emma Samms (off Dynasty)
- Rowetta (ex-Happy Mondays sidewoman and The X Factor contestant)
- Steve Strange (new romantic icon)
Series 2
- Aled Haydn Jones (one of Chris Moyles' sidekicks)
- Ben Nicholas (ex-Neighbours actor)
- Brandon Block (club DJ)
- Carley Stenson (Hollyoaks actress)
- Lil' Chris (singer)
- Javine (singer)
- Ninia Benjamin (comedian)
- Tamara Beckwith (columnist/presenter)
- Warwick Davis (actor)
Series 3
- Chris Perry-Metcalf (ex-Grange Hill actor)
- Jay Sean (singer)
- Jeff Leach (presenter)
- Jessica-Jane Clement (actress/presenter)
- Kym Mazelle (singer)
- Lee MacDonald (a.k.a. - Zammo from Grange Hill)
- Lucinda Ledgerwood (fired Apprentice candidate)
- Sabrina Washington (singer off Mis-Teeq)
- Scott Robinson (singer off Five)
- Shana Swash (Eastenders actor)
- Stedman Pearson (singer of Five Star)
Theme music
Marc Sylvan
